An Unexpected Reaction

As we sat in church yesterday (after her first reconciliation) waiting for mass to end, I leaned over and quietly asked my sweet little girl, "Do you know what fabric I'm using for your Communion dress?  I'm going to use my wedding dress!" with a big smile on my face.

At which point she promptly started crying.  She thought that I would be sad to cut my dress, and didn't want to be the reason for my sadness.

What?! I thought she'd be excited (like me), and it never dawned on me that she wouldn't want to use it for her communion dress.  And then I remembered how disappointed I was that my mom cut up her wedding gown to make my older sister's baptismal gown, and that I never got to see either the dress in person, or the baptismal gown for that matter.  I suddenly realized that I never considered my daughter's feelings in my plans for one of the most special dresses in her life.  Crap.

When we got home, I opened up the garment bag, and spread out the dress and the train on my bed.  I breathed a HUGE sigh of relief seeing that the train is constructed with plenty of satin.  I don't know how to photograph it to show you, but there's the long train (lace cut outs) part, and it continues around to a shorter side (that faced into the back of my dress) and attached to the back of my dress.  See?

So, I called her in, and proceeded with extreme caution...
"Honey? First I need you to know that the most important thing to me is that you are happy.  I'm not sad to cut my dress for you, so please don't worry that it makes me sad to cut my wedding dress.  Someday, you'll be a grown-up, and you'll get married, and I think that you will want your very own dress.  But, maybe you might want to use part of my dress for yours. If you don't that's okay, too.  Maybe you'll want to buy your dress in a store.  We don't know what will happen, because it's very far away, right?" (I emphasized the "very far" part!) "Number 1 is that you are happy.  And I am not sad.  Got it?"  Head nod.  Ok, proceed...  oops.  The phone starts ringing.  I go answer it, which takes a few minutes, and when I return she ahs questions.  "Where did you get your dress?"  "It's so pretty..."  "Was it expensive?"  "You were so lucky to have such nice dress, Mom..."  Wow.  How did I get so lucky to have such an awesome kid?  I answer her questions, and can see the wheels turning.  She likes the fabric, the lace, the pearl beads...

"Ok, we have 3 options.  Are you ready?
Option 1: We don't cut any part of the dress or the train. We put it away and someday when you get married, maybe we'll use it, and maybe we won't.  But we'll make your Communion dress out of some other fabric."
"Option 2:  We don't cut the dress, but we use the train instead.  See? There's lots of fabric.  So much fabric, I could cover you from head to toe... twice."

She's under there.  Promise.

"And we'll put the dress part away.  Again, maybe we'll use it, maybe we won't.  And see the lace on the edge of the train?  We can use that on the bottom of your dress, too."

"Option 3:  We use both parts, and cut the dress and the train for your Communion dress.  I think that when you're a grown-up, you'll want a dress of your very own, but maybe I'm wrong."

"What do you think?"  There is a brief pause (the wheels are still turning, but I can tell, she knows what she wants), and says, "I think we should do Option 2, use the train, but not the dress."



Phew.  Compromise!  Works for me.  Everyone is happy, and when I show her the Vogue pattern, she starts telling me where the lace will go.  I love having a daughter, and I especially love having mine.

The underside of the train, where I'll cut most of her dress from.

Now, how to get started?  I'm thinking I'll start snipping the threads that are attaching all the trim at the hem.  I don't think I want to jump into making a muslin yet, the girl is still growing and April is a ways away!

In addition, my "flowergirl" (who is now a college freshman), gave DD her flowergirl dress for dress-up, but it's too small.  In excellent condition, we will use the over-skirt of pearl-studded tulle for her veil.  I think I'll edge it in satin, too...

As an aside... the embroidery business is in full swing, with about 65 sweatshirt orders.  Friday at school was fun, seeing teachers and students all over the building wearing my stuff!  I'm officially a trendsetter (in my little world)!